I know its pretty late now. But, I cant seem to go to bed or was it I chose not to go to bed. I have so much things in my mind at the moment. I had just finished my draft presentation notes for my oral this coming wednesday. However, I still have another assignment due this week which I need to get started on.

Everyone in my class had started complaining about it like the work load and how hard it is to finish it. I am dreading the time I'll be starting on this assignment. I pray that I can finish in time and also put my 100 percent effort in this assignment.

Anyway, what is troubling me is not of academic matters but of the heart. I have been troubled with this single notion of seeing someone. I feel that I shouldnt be thinking about it too much. But, when I am alone like tonight, it starts bothering me. I had told by my friends several times that everything will go fine if I behave myself. Just be myself they say!. I know its easy to say then doing it. I still feel that I shouldnt go. Its like if I went I'll be heartbroken or more be rejected.

I really wish I have a time machine and turn time forward  a week so that I can get over this decision that I had made earlier. I never realised that I would be so such a fray that I cant seem to control my insanity. Maybe a kiss would do to wake me up from my beauty sleep or maybe a potion to cure my disease. One thing or another, the close the day comes, the more high strung I become. I think I am imagining too much about what would happen on the night itself.

I guess seeing her in her utmost beauty and slenderness will definitely melt my heart. Maybe I feel this way because I want her bad but I dont know if she knows.

Oh, dear Alchemist! Where is thy cure of this calaminity I am in. Cure me! Even with your deadliest potion is still a cure for this loneliness inside. If only to see my match once more, will lead me to instant death. Death itself could be a cure but here is Nothing! Only a kiss. A betrothed kiss would be my balm. On my lips and on my bossom, I will feel your embrace. Your looks and kiss is enough to slay the most wretched dragon in all Fantasia! Just wished it may be true to me as it was in you! Farewell my beloved! Fare ye well!

Time is ticking and time to bed had arrived. Farewell thee traveller of time. May we meet one day in different circumstances from tonight.

Weeks close to my Heart

I haven't blog for a long time. My birthday is so close yet I am not looking forward to it. I had shared with my close friends why I never liked this week. I have so many things in my mind. I only like this week to be over so I can continue living my life.

I pray to God and I hope he hears me. I have so much things in my head that only He can help me through this period. I want this week to be over.

I never had such a rollercoaster week in winter, summer or autumn. Why does it have to happen when spring is here?  Will it be 500 days of spring or will it change. Again, I want this week to over.

Night time is cold, lonely and restless. I always look forward to go to sleep because I can escape from reality and release me to my own dreams. I want this week to be over.

Tommorow is always a new day but funny thing at night the same thing always happen. I want this week to be over.

I looked at myself in the window and see that I havent changed much. Though I look plumpier, there is no way I can be happy on this week. I want this to be over.

Where can I run and escape this down period of my life? Why do I want to hide away from my own feelings and the darkness and light of my heart? How do I dealt with this?

I only can say, I want this week to be over.